QUOTES of the week

‘It’s like climbing Everest in their flip-flops.’ Baroness Casey outlines the scale of the problem facing Scotland Yard after her scathing report highlighted misogyny, racism and homophobia in the ranks.

‘See it. Say it. Ignore it.’

Slogan on posters plastered on London train stations by feminist activists – mocking the police’s ‘See it. Say it. Sorted’ slogan – following Baroness Casey’s report.

‘Flank of buffalo with a steroid sauce.’ Coldplay’s Chris Martin jokes about his favourite meal after revealing he eats only once a day.

‘Congratulations to Chris Mason for using a phrase I last heard on my school playground.’ Today programme host Nick Robinson

after the BBC’s Political Editor suggested a Northern Ireland Brexit vote would provide Boris Johnson with an opportunity to kick Rishi Sunak ‘in the goolies’.

‘I heard this hysterical scream… Just absolutely like King Kong coming out of the jungle.’

Terry Sanderson describes the noise he claims Gwyneth Paltrow made just before a skiing collision left him with broken ribs and brain damage.

‘When I went into TV 43 years ago, you’d be sacked for not wearing a tie on air. Now it’s almost at the stage where you’d be sacked for wearing one.’ Broadcaster Michael Crick laments the demise of workplace sartorial standards.

‘I had to queue just to get off the driveway and it was only going to get worse.’

Anthony Muir, who was so tired of traffic outside his Kent semi that he and wife Heidi moved to a French chateau – for half the price of their old home.

‘We fell in love again. I was overwhelmed with my love for her.’

Len Allbrighton, 79, after finding and finally marrying 78-yearold Jeanette Steer in Stevenage – 60 years after her parents put an end to their engagement.