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Electric shocks as a form of entertainment? No thanks

Deborah Ross

In its publicity blitzkrieg, which seemed to go on for ever, Rise And Fall was billed as the new Traitors, as made by the folk who made The Traitors, to fill the hole left by The Traitors. But I spotted how Rise And Fall was different from The Traitors almost immediately: it’s not nearly as good. I lasted two episodes, which amounted to nearly two-and-a-half hours, before I gave up in despair. It was enough.

The thing about The Traitors, which I’ll stop going on about shortly, I promise, is that, most significantly, it marked a return to contestants as regular people. It could have been you. It could have been me. They did mean things, but they knew, and we knew, it was a game.

But this is mostly populated by those reality wannabes who are surely produced in the factory that also supplies The Apprentice. I heard: ‘There can only be one person on top and it’s going to be me.’ And: ‘In the end they’re going to trust me so much they’re going to doubt themselves.’ I did not hear ‘I’m here to make friends, I’m not here to win’, although that would be my dream contestant, yes indeed.

The deal here is that six of the 16 contestants occupy a luxury penthouse with champagne on tap at the top of an ‘iconic’ London building – the hulking stone mass above St James’s Tube station that was once London Transport’s HQ. They are the ‘rulers’ who make all the decisions. Meanwhile, the others, the ‘grafters’, must live in a dingy basement with hard beds and cold showers while subsisting on potato-peel broth.

Rulers can fall. Grafters can rise. The rulers must put the grafters to work – that is, complete a series of tasks – in order to build up the prize money. The last one standing could win up to £100,000. The first task, I should tell you, involved the grafters receiving electric shocks. The publicity blitzkrieg also described this as a ‘social experiment’ about ‘capitalism’ and ‘inequality’, but how would the marketing bumf put it if it had to be truthful? We’re going to electrocute Jeff for your entertainment?

It didn’t seem to say much about anything. The first set of rulers self-selected themselves by rushing into the lift to take them to the top. One fella, Ali, who didn’t make the lift, almost immediately quit. ‘I can’t be a follower, I’m a leader,’ he said. Many described themselves as the CEO of something or other, but even the fella who was a postal worker and the fella who was a nurse were offputtingly pompous.

I was also rather baffled. We didn’t see much of either team except when a task or vote was in hand and I wondered: what are they actually doing all day? As for the presenter, Greg James, he barely appeared at all. And now I can’t devote any more time to it as I need to tell you all about The Cockfields.

This is a comedy that seems to have gone under the radar. It first appeared on the Gold channel in 2019, but now it’s made it to the BBC. I watched the first series (three episodes) and the second series (six episodes) and the Christmas special in one sitting.

It takes a lot to make me happy, as you know, and this so did. It has the same spirit as Mum, which has to be the highest praise. It’s charming, gentle, affectionate, with characters you will truly come to care about.

It is written by David Earl and Joe Wilkinson and stars Wilkinson as Simon,

returning home to visit his family on the Isle of Wight with his girlfriend Donna (Diane Morgan). Sue Johnston plays his mother, Sue, while Bobby Ball (yes, the one who wasn’t Cannon, he’s terrifically good) plays his stepfather Ray.

I don’t see how the cast could be bettered unless, say, Nigel Havers turned up as Simon’s dad with a hot girlfriend played by Sarah Parish, and guess what? They’re both in it too! I should mention, due to Bobby Ball’s death, in the second series Gregor Fisher plays Ray, while Simon has a new girlfriend, Esther (Susannah Fielding). Also, there’s David (Ben Rufus Green), Simon’s socially awkward stepbrother, who is a celebrity spotter – ‘I have Clare Balding’ – and because Alan Titchmarsh has bought a house on the island at one point they all sit in the car outside, just so they can look at his gate. Not so funny on paper but I promise you: I laughed my head off.

All the characters are somehow like people you know. Sue is loving but over-attentive. ‘Are you cold, Donna? Do you want to do any washing, Donna? Do you want more pillows, Donna? I’ll bring you two more just in case.’ Ray is controlling – ‘Park close to the flower bed, Simon… try again and park a wee bit closer’ – but well-meaning. No one ever laughs at David, only with him.

It captures all those typical family discussions, with debates about Heinz v Co-op own- brand soup, or resetting the oven clock after a power cut. ‘I can’t bear to see it flashing, can you?’

When Simon finally convinces Sue and Ray to let him take them out to lunch, there has to be a dummy run the day before ‘to check out the car park’. And it has genuine emotional heft. David has a ‘date’. It doesn’t go well.

You’re going to love it, and you are going to want to thank me for bringing it to your attention. It doesn’t have to be flowers, but a card would be nice.

Tv & Critics

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2023-03-26T07:00:00.0000000Z

2023-03-26T07:00:00.0000000Z

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