By HUNTER DAVIES

WHAT would you do if you suddenly won £18? You know, out of the blue? Me? Instead of buying the special offer £8 New Zealand Marlborough Sauvignon Blanc, I would splash out and buy a bottle of top Chablis at £18. What fun, let’s go mad for once.

And if I won £184? There are some banana plants I saw on a mail-order offer which would make my garden look fab, though I had been thinking: come on, be sensible, £184 for some plants that might not last the summer? Don’t be daft.

And £18,400 – surely I could spend that wisely? Help the world, help my grandchildren? Good idea. I’d take them all to the Lake District for the half-term hols.

But what about £18million? If that suddenly appeared in my HSBC bank account, what would I do? Leave HSBC for a start.

I hate them and would be glad to get shot of them. I’d take out all the cash and keep it under the bed. Safer there than any dodgy investments or horrible banks.

But hold on. Just imagine for a moment that – incredibly, amazingly, unbelievably – you have just won £184million, the biggest Lottery win ever in the UK?

That’s what happened last week to a middle-aged couple in the Cotswolds. What would you do then?

What would I do? Keep it secret, for a start. How embarrassing. How awful. Imagine having everyone knowing for ever that you had won such a ridiculous, obscene sum.

And yet, more than the 30 years since our National Lottery began, three out of ten of the big winners have gone public. Much, of course, to the delight of Camelot, the Lottery organisers. And the art designer whose job is to create a giant mock-up of the winning cheque which gets displayed to the TV cameras at a press conference in a local – and usually rather downmarket – hotel.

Why do they agree to the publicity? That’s the bit I don’t get. Surely they are encouraging jealousy, begging letters and hate mail.

Is it because: a) They are dopey, with no imagination; b) Camelot has sweet-hearted them into it; c) They are show-offs; d) They want people to envy them, especially those they know never liked them; e) They want their family and friends to share in what they think will be fun and excitement; f) They always wanted to be on TV and in the papers; g) They think they will be celebs, and get to know Rebekah Vardy; h) They have been blabbing down the pub, so they knew it would get out eventually; i) They decide it’s best to get it over

with, in one go, one event; j) They fear it will be a burden, living with a secret, if they don’t go public?

That last reason is apparently what the £184 million winners, Joe and Jess Thwaite from the Cotswolds, said.

So they agreed to go before the cameras, give each other a big kiss and wave the phoney cheque in the air. It is fairly understandable. Such a phenomenal win was bound to get out once they started splashing the cash.

In fact, they sound pretty sensible, and not short of a bob or two anyway. They live in a yummy-looking £600,000 house near Gloucester. She manages a hair salon and he is an engineer. Good luck to them.

Now it is out, they have had their day under the TV lights. They will be hoping they won’t change, will remain the same people. Which is what all winners think. The same people – just with more money. And so able to tell the world to eff off.

Obviously, if you have personal problems, mental health issues, a rotten relationship, are on the booze or drugs, then the chances are the money will exaggerate your problems and enable you to indulge your vices.

But the vast majority are not like that – they are decent, law-abiding, only wanting the best for their children, their family, neighbours and society. Will they be happier? They all hope so but most other people think they won’t be, believing money does not make winners happy.

Look at the evidence, at all the stories of big winners over the past 30 years. You will see that many appear to have ended up bust, lonely, suicidal, their life in tatters.

It would seem to be the norm, alas, if you read all the horror stories.

Is it true? I did try to find out. When the National Lottery began on November 19, 1994, I bought a ticket. Not to win any money, wash your mouth out. Money is the last thing I need in life. I won the lottery when I married my wife in 1960. Really, my whole life went well from then on.

Even though she died six years ago and I am now on my own, I count my blessings all the time about how lucky I have been in life. I wanted the ticket for two reasons. As memorabilia, for my collection of social-history ephemera. And also because I had just had the most brilliant idea.

When I read, as we all did at the time, that Camelot were going to start our first modern lottery and give billions to good causes, to the arts, sports, culture, blah-blah, I thought to hell with the good causes. What about the winners? How will it affect their lives? Poor sods. Will they end up happier? They don’t know how becoming overnight millionaires will hit them.

I contacted Camelot about doing a book on Lottery winners. I wanted to meet them when they won – then again a year later, to see how their lives have changed.

After a bit of faffing, Camelot agreed to help. They would even allow me access to some of those who had chosen to remain anonymous. With their agreement, of course.

And I promised I would change

Why do they agree to the publicity, encouraging hate mail?