YULETIDE TOP TEN
1 Did you hear about the Christmas cake on display in the British Museum?
It was stollen.
2 Why is Elon Musk’s Christmas dinner so awkward? He can’t stop talking about his X.
3 Why isn’t Barbie having turkey for Christmas dinner this year? Chic-Ken is enough.
4 Why aren’t any schools allowed to put on a Nativity this year? They couldn’t find a stable building.
5 What impact will the 20mph speed limit in Wales have on the charts this year? Chris Rea will be driving home for Easter.
6 What happened to Mark Zuckerberg’s novelty jumper when he had a cage fight with Elon Musk? He was left with nothing but Threads.
7 What’s the difference between The Polar Express and HS2? One’s a fantasy about a train and the other’s a film with Tom Hanks.
8 What did J Robert Oppenheimer get Barbie for Christmas? Atomic Kenergy.
9 Why are the train drivers on the naughty list this year? Because they’ve already had three strikes!
10 How does Margot Robbie decorate her Nativity scene? With three wise Ken.
dmg media (UK)